​Country & Western music has had no shortage of dark themes running throughout its long history. Tales of alcoholism, lost loved ones, and murder are common place within the genre. But on occasion the music has taken a detour into the downright bizarre, and in some instances even flirted with the supernatural. As we delve deeper into the Halloween season, let’s take a look at some of the more sinister tunes to come out of the Weird West over the years. 

​Riders in the Sky – Sons of the Pioneers
This song tells the story of an old legend about a herd of ghost cattle being chased across the sky by the spirits of cowboys damned to pursue them for all of eternity.

More commonly known as "Ghost Riders in the Sky", the song was first written and recorded by Western music singer/songwriter, Stan Jones in 1948.  It is considered to be one of the greatest cowboy songs of all time and has been recorded by over fifty artists in years since it was first released. You might be familiar with Johny Cash’s version from 1979.

I personally like this version by Country Western vocal legends, The Sons of the Pioneers from their 1960 album Cool Water.

Phantom 309 – Red Sovine
Red Sovine was a pioneer of the trucker ballad genre in late sixties and early seventies. He scored a number of hits with his sentimental tales of long distance truck drivers.

In 1967 he drove that big rig right into the Weird West with this tale about a hitchhiker who is given a ride by a mysterious truck driver named “Big Joe”.  Later when the hitchhiker tells a truck stop waiter who gave him a ride he finds outs that the kindly truck drive was actually a ghost.

​If you were thinking that all this paranormal activity means that this one is spooky rather than sentimental, forget about it. The waiter also reveals that the truck driver died swerving off the road to save a school bus full of children.

Tom Waits reinterpreted the song as Big Joe and Phantom 309 as heard on 1975’s live recording, Nighthawks at the Diner, and it appears to me to be the inspiration for “Large Marge” in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure. 

Psycho – Eddie Noack
This 1968 single, told from the perspective of a serial killer, was penned by prolific songwriter Leon Payne, whose work has been recorded by a veritable who’s who of country music legends, most famously with Hank Williams iconic version of his song “Lost Highway".  

With intensely dark lyrics about animal and child murder delivered straight to a chilling effect, it’s no wonder "Psycho" failed to impact the charts. Although it has since achieved cult status and is Noack’s most well-known recording. He would revisit similar themes in the twisted murder ballad "Delores" a few months later.

The song starts out as a paint-by-numbers country ballad to mama, before quickly taking a hard left turn into the mind of madman. It tells the story of a heavy-hearted narrator, speaking directly to his mother, who laments his compulsion to kill, imploring her to “let'em lock me up” before he takes another life.  Or is it already too late? You’ll have to listen and find out for yourself…

Monster’s Holiday – Buck Owens
Buck Owens and his band, The Buckaroos were an integral part of the development of the Bakersfield sound, a rock & roll influenced strain of country music that sprung up in Bakersfield, California as a response to the overly polished mainstream country music coming out of Nashville in the late 1950’s.

Owens racked up a slew of hits over the course of his career including an impressive twenty-one #1’s and was covered by the likes of The Beatles who let Ringo sing his 1963 hit "Act Naturally" on their 1965 album Help!

Although not a #1 hit, the Halloween novelty song "Monster’s Holiday" did manage to crack the Top Ten in 1974. Basically an excuse to name check a rouges gallery of movie monsters and other creepy crawlies, this is a fun listen and an example of pure bubblegum rockabilly. 

Thirteen – Johnny Cash
This ominous tune was written for Cash by Glen Danzig for 1994’s American Recordings, an album which would usher in a late-career renascence for the battered country legend in the midst of the alt-rock revolution.

The song is sung from the first person perspective of brooding loner, who was given the number 13 as child instead of a name. Filled with anger from a lifetime of hardship, he prays that no one even makes eye contact with him lest they feel the wrath of his murderous rage.

Danzig has described "Thirteen" as his “impression of who Johnny Cash was and what he meant.” You can hear his version of the song here, including an extra verse that Cash didn’t think was right for the song.

If you grew up in the 80’s or 90’s you probably remember author Alvin Schwartz’s Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark trilogy, a collection of creepy folklore tales for kids. If you don’t remember the stories themselves, there’s a good chance you still have an occasional nightmare inspired by the accompanying artwork by acclaimed children’s illustrator, Stephen Gammell. Even if you’ve never read the books, just accidentally seeing the cover of one of them while you were innocently perusing the book store or library was enough to induce long-term psychological effects.

And if you got over the initial trauma of viewing the cover and dared to open up one of those books and read it? Well, let’s just say that some things can’t be unseen.

Gammell has illustrated countless “normal” children’s books over the course of his vast career, even earning himself a Caldecott Award for his work on the lighthearted Song and Dance Man by Karen Ackerman. But it is his work on the Scary Stories books for which he is most fondly (or not so fondly depending on much sleep you lost because of him over the years) remembered.

“Macabre”, “surreal”, “haunting”, these are the words that come to mind when you look at Gammells work. But it is also grotesquely beautiful and extremely powerful. Even out of the context of the books the pictures create an inescapable  sense of dread. 

These are the kind of images that work their way insidiously into the darkest corners of your psyche where they wait patiently, sometimes years, for just the right time. When you’re home alone on a blustery Autumn night, the house creaking and moanijng, and you find yourself jumping at shadows, only then do the ghouls and ghosts that inhabit Gammell’s grim landscapes come creeping back into your mind’s eye.

Considering the terror-inducing content, it is no surprise that the Scary Stories to Tell in The Dark series are some of most challenged books in recent memory. According to the ALA, they were the #1 most frequently challenged books for 1990-1999 and stayed in the top ten for 2000-2009 at #7. The most frequently cited reasons being “insensitivity, occult/Satanism, violence, (and being) unsuited to age group".

Gammell’s illustrations no doubt contributed as much as, if not more than, the text to garnering the books this dubious honor.

Harper Collins re-issued the books for their 30th anniversary in 2011, sadly replacing Stephen Gammell’s eerie illustrations with “safer” work by Brett Helquist of A Series of Unfortunately Events fame. Thus saving the next generation of kids from a lifetime of nightmares and their parents a lifetime of therapy expenses. 

(Little do my sweet, unsuspecting children know that I still have copies featuring Gammell's original artwork to spring on them when the time is right. Moooohahahahahaha!)

So as we near the end of Banned Books Week and the beginning of the Halloween season let’s take a moment to remember (and then immediately try to forget) the immortal artwork of Stephen Gammell.

But only if you dare…

(Seriously, don't say I didn't warn you.)

Bonus Track: Listen to the complete audiobook of 1981's Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. Collected from folklore and retold by Alvin Schwartz, accompanied by chilling illustrations from Stephen Gammell and narrated by actor George S. Irving.

The Single File is regular feature where I explore this history of  the promotional single by taking a look them one by one. Each installment will feature an individual release, the only criteria being that it was officially released as a single, and that I like it, or at least find it interesting. Expect to see some hits, some rarities and of course some oddities from any and all genres.

First in line is David Bowie’s “1984”, a song inspired by George Orwell’s 1948 novel of the same name. Commonly challenged and banned for its social and political critiques as well as some sexual references, the book has ranked as high as #5 on the most banned books of all time. Since I’m kicking off this new column during Banned Books Week, I figured I would I discuss a single relevant to the topic.

Only released in three countries, “1984” was the third single off of Bowie’s Diamond Dogs album. Put out by RCA/Victor in July 1974, the U.S. and New Zealand versions featured Hunky Dory rocker, "Queen Bitch" as the B-side. In Japan, it was the Aladdin Sane ballad, "Lady Grinning Soul".

Although it never charted, the song is notable in the Bowie for catalog for a number reasons, not the least of which being that it’s really good. It helped bridge the gap between Bowie’s glam rock phase which ended with Diamond Dogs, and the so-called “plastic-soul” of 1975’s Young Americans album. In addition, it sheds some light onto Bowie’s creative process as it is one of only a few songs salvaged from an otherwise abandoned project.

Dystopian lyrics carried along by a driving cinematic funk score, the song sounds like it could be the theme to a 70’s Blaxploitation adaption of Orwell’s novel.  Not surprising since musically, it was heavily influenced by the work of soul legend Isaac Hayes, specifically his work on “Theme from Shaft” from 1971. This trend towards R&B would foreshadow Bowie’s attempt to capture the “Philly Soul” sound in the coming months. The tumultuous year in which this transition took place is chronicled nicely in this NPR article from 2014.

"1984” is not the only song on Diamond Dogs to cite Orwell’s seminal work. In fact, many of the songs on the album loosely form a concept that shares a similar theme, and a few, such as “Big Brother” and “We Are the Dead”, reference the book directly. This is because the album began life as what Bowie original intended to be a musical adaption of Orwell’s novel produced for television. Ultimately, that project fell apart but some of the songs survived and made their way onto the album as we know it. If you’d like to learn more about this lost project, Open Culture did a great piece on it earlier this year.

Whether you view “1984” as a glimpse into the future of what Bowie would soon become, or as a relic of his past ambitions, one thing is for certain, it’s a great song.

Bonus Track: Check out Bowie's legendary live performance of "1984" from The Dick Cavett Show on December 5, 1974.
 
Banned Books Week 2016: Celebrating our Freedom to Read (September 29th – October 1st)

I discovered J.D. Salinger’s seminal novel of teenage angst when I was in eighth grade. At the time I didn’t know anything about it other than the fact that it was widely considered to be a “literary classic”.

The cover provided no clues as to the book’s contents. It was simply a blank, maroon cover with the title and author’s name in gold Times New Roman capitalized. And the same on the back. There was no synopsis, no blurbs hailing it as a masterpiece, nothing except the author’s credit and that title.

Catcher in the Rye. What did that lousy title even mean anyway?

Even without really knowing anything about the novel, I felt compelled to read it. Not because I had to for school, because I wanted to. So I did. I don’t know exactly what it was about the mysterious little book that drew me in. It was probably that title.

I just had to know what the hell it meant. 

By this point in my life I already had a lot of books under my belt, but almost all of them were fantastical in one way or another. It was a lot of sci-fi, sword & sorcery, and, like most horror-obsessed kids of my generation, the complete works of Stephen King.

Catcher in The Rye was to be my first foray into “serious” adult literature. 

As a middle-schooler looking to expand my literary horizons, the idea of reading many of the so-called “classics” was a daunting one. Most of them were great, thick, books with impossibly small print in order to cram as many words on each page as possible. And although written in English, they seemed foreign to me. The language they used was somehow even more dense than the physical book in which held it. Many of these works were still intimidating to me when I had to read them in college years later, let alone as a thirteen year-old looking to read for pleasure.

But this book was different. It was short, especially when compared to the massive books I had recently tackled including, It and The Stand by the aforementioned Mr. King. Not to mention the print was normal sized. This was book I could easily digest, and I knew I could get through it, even it was a complete bore.

(Did I mention I have this thing about finishing a book once I start?)

Like I said, I had no idea what to expect when I started reading it. I certainly didn’t anticipate that it would completely change my life.

But it did. Like in a big way…

From the first paragraph my mind was blown wide open. It not only changed my whole perspective on what literature could be, it changed the way I looked at myself in relation to the world.

This was heavy stuff.

Of the countless books I had read up to this point, even the ones written in first person, none of them felt like they were speaking directly to me. Not really anyway.

They spoke to me in general sense. I was merely a passive witness to the narrator telling their story. This was different. I felt like Holden Caulfield was speaking directly to me personally, in a language I could understand and relate to. In fact, it was pretty much the same language my friends and I used when we were alone together, cuss words and all.

​It is ironic that the main reason this book is one of the most frequently challenged and banned of all time is the language. Because without it, this book wouldn’t have had nearly the same impact on me. The fact that Holden spoke so bluntly and realistically is exactly why his words resonated so much.

​One of the most heartbreaking things about adolescence is realizing that your idealized childhood perception of the world doesn’t really exist. For the first time you realize that there are a lot of Phonies, and life doesn’t always have a happy ending. It’s like a breath of fresh air for a young person dealing with this new sense of uncertainty to hear a voice that echoes their own, processing similar things in the same way. That language is part of what makes this book uniquely qualified as gateway to literature for disaffected youth.

Holden didn’t just talk like me, he felt like me. He was lost and confused, disillusioned with the looming idea of adulthood as the candy-colored façade of his childhood slowly eroded.

Suddenly I didn’t feel so alone in the world.

But I think the thing about Holden that connected with me most was the fact that in spite of being so heavy-hearted, he was consistently hilarious. I mean really funny. I found myself laughing out loud throughout pretty much the entire book and I immediately locked in on the idea that despair could be tempered with humor. It most certainly informed my own artistic endeavors later in life when I pursued my own writing and embarked on the journey of becoming a stand-up comic.

In addition to providing me with a new perspective on myself and the world at large, reading Catcher in the Rye for the first time also made me realize that fiction doesn’t have to be fantasy in order to be engrossing. In fact, sometimes realism can be even more compelling. Nor does it have to fit neatly into one box. It can be humorous and sad, nihilistic and inspiring, heartwarming and gut-wrenching, or all of the above at the same time.

Plus, I finally learned what the hell that lousy title was all about…

Neil Young explored similar themes of teenage disillusionment in the song, "Sugar Mountain", written on his nineteenth birthday. Here's a performance of it from the 1979 concert movie, Rust Never Sleeps.

Banned Books Week 2016: Celebrating our Freedom to Read (September 29th – October 1st)

http://www.bannedbooksweek.org/

In June 1964, a young British blues band led by guitarist Tony McPhee was in the right place at the right time when John Mayall & The Bluesbreakers were unexpectedly unable to fulfill their commitment as the backup band for the legendary John Lee Hooker on the last week of his British tour.
 
The Groundhogs, who had taken their name from a 1951 Hooker recording called “Groundhog Blues”, of course jumped at the opportunity to back their idol. If they were nervous it didn’t show, and they absolutely nailed the gigs.
 
Hooker, who was notoriously difficult to keep up with on stage, was in fact so impressed with the band he brought them along on his subsequent tour of the UK the following summer, and into the studio to record material that would eventually end up on albums such as ...And Seven Nights in 1965 and 1970’s On The Waterfront.

Though they were uncredited on the original LPs, the were later recognized when some of the songs appeared on a 1972  Cleve Records release. In 1996, Indigo Records put out Hooker & The Hogs credited to “John Lee Hooker with The Groundhogs”. It features the stripped back recordings from these sessions without  horns and other flourishes, that were later dubbed in on the original versions. The result is a lean and ferocious set of electric blues. It is available to stream on Spotify.

Here’s some great footage of “Hooker & The Hogs” from a May 1965 appearance on The Beat Room a BBC2 program on which musical acts performed live for a room full of dancing teenagers. Think American Bandstand without the lip synching…
 
Hooker is in top form here, and the blues are down and dirty. I have to imagine that the juxtaposition of all these proper  youths dancing to this primal, unfiltered, Mississippi Blues must have raised the eyebrow of more than few British parents. 

​As the 1960’s progressed into the 1970’s The Groundhogs evolved into a fearsome and highly underrated power trio. They had moderate success in the UK, landing three albums on the Top Ten between 1970 and 1972, but they failed to make any impact on this side of the pond as many of their contemporaries did.
 
If, like me, you are a fan of blues-based British guitar rock, their discography is definitely worth delving into while you’re counting down the days until spring.
 
Here’s a taste…

Listen up punks,

If you show up on my doorstep looking for candy on Halloween night, I’m telling you right now that you had better come correct. I have a rigid set of criteria that I use to determine if you’re going to receive a treat, and if so, what kind.

Here’s the deal.

If you’re not wearing a costume, you’re not getting any candy.

And no, your little league uniform doesn’t count.

You could at least put some effort into it, and make yourself an undead little leaguer or something.

Seriously, stop being such a goddamn slacker. If you don’t change your ways now, you’ll probably grow up to be one of those assholes who wears their work uniform to a Halloween party. Ooohhh, you’re a spooky UPS driver? Great costume, bro…

The quality of the candy you receive from me is directly proportionate to the quality of your costume.

I’m not wasting my Kit Kats on some lame ass store bought costume. And if I tell you, “That’s a Whopper of costume!” it’s not a good thing. It means your costume sucks. You’re getting Whoppers.

Bottom line, if you’re wearing a lame costume, I hope you like Dum Dums, Dum Dum.

And don’t be grabby. Halloween candy isn’t cheap and this bowl has to last all night. If you want to gouge the dopes that leave an unattended “honor system” bowl on their porch, have at it. Take all their candy. Break into their obviously unattended homes and rob them of their valuables if you want, it’s the least they deserve for being such nitwits. But at my house you’re going to get one piece of candy and that’s it.

Also…

If you come to my house sporting real facial hair, you’re too old to be trick-or-treating and you’re not getting any candy. Note: This rule applies to both boys and girls.

If you’re putting out a cigarette as you walk up to my house, you’re definitely not getting any fucking candy.

If I suspect that you are drunk and/or high, not only will you not get any candy, I will be forced to contact the proper authorities. I may be persuaded to look the other way if you agree to surrender all of the alcohol and/or illegal drugs in your possession, as well as any candy you may have collected, to me for “proper disposal.”

​I realize that I may be coming across a bit harshly here, so I want to assure you that the most important thing to me is that you kids to have a safe and happy Halloween​. As long as it doesn’t include being stupid, annoying me with you half-ass costumes, or interfering in any way with my enjoyment of the holiday.

My rules are strict but they are fair. And as long as we are all on the same page when you come knocking, maybe, just maybe, we can all have nice Halloween for once. Or, you can keep being a jerk-off your whole life.

Your call…

I just came across this video on Facebook after it was shared on a friend's wall and I had to share.

It's Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young with Tom Jones delivering an earth shattering rendition of "Long Time Gone" from an episode of the ABC variety show, This is Tom Jones originally aired on October 16th, 1969.

Only a few months after Young joined the group, his blistering guitar work lays the groundwork for this loose and raucous performance. The guys in the band, Crosby and Nash in particular, are clearly amused and/or impressed by TJ's vocal prowess and collectively, they bring down the house.

This is officially now one of my favorite live performances of all time.

Enjoy!

It’s well documented that the story of Brian Wilson and The Beach Boys is a dark one, filled with horrors both real and imagined. Child abuse, mental health issues, familial bickering all, in some strange way contributed to some of the most beautiful music of the modern era.

And although The Beach Boys will always be remembered for their sunny pop melodies, there have been a few occasions on which they have dabbled in the macabre.
 
They included a cover of “Monster Mash” by Bobby “Boris” Pickett & the Crypt Keepers on their 1964 live album, Beach Boys Concert.

​Here they are performing the song live on the December 23, 1964 episode of the ABC variety series, Shindig!. Whatever your personal feelings towards Mike Love are in regards to the legacy of The Beach Boys, you have to admit it’s entertaining as hell to watch him ham it up in this clip.

It turns out The Beach Boys have a more than a passing association with “Monster Mash.” According to this 2014 Noisey article, before they broke big themselves, they backed Bobby “Boris” Pickett on one of his first live performances of the song.

And apparently it still holds a special place Brian Wilson’s heat, as he has used the song to sound check with his band at least as recently as 2009.

Brian Wilson has often been described as a mad scientist in terms songwriting and studio production, and nowhere does he embrace that persona more than in this 1970 demo recording. Intended be his spin on the concept of a Halloween novelty song, “My Solution” features a trippy spoken-word rap over a bed of Gothic synthesizers, laboratory sound effects, and some signature Beach Boys harmonies thrown in for good measure.

On the surface, “Never Learn to Love” the B-Side to The Beach Boys’ 1968 single “Bluebirds over the Mountain” wouldn’t seem to have any association with anything horrific, but it does have the dubious honor of being a rewrite  by Dennis Wilson of a song  by infamous murder conspirator and guru, Charles Manson called “Cease to Exist.” Manson was allegedly furious that his not only did Dennis change the lyrics to  his song, he also failed to credit him as a writer on the album, and as a result, threatened him with murder after its release. 

​It's clear that while much of the music of Brian Wilson and The Beach Boys was about having fun in the sun, they were no strangers to the creepy, crawling things that come out long after the sun has set.

Check out this absolutely smoking live performance of "Frankenstein" by the Edgar Winter Group from a 1973 television appearance. 

Edgar, a talented multi-instrumentalist, is a  beast on synth, sax, drums and the soundboard itself throughout the course of this MONSTER nine minute jam.

​Enjoy!

​My plan for the month of October was to focus most of my blog posts on the fun, scary horror-related stuff that goes along with the Halloween season.  But I’d like to take some time today to address a real life horror that many women in our country and around the world still face today, domestic violence.
 
My family recently participated in the Women's Center of Montgomery County's Walk/Run to End Domestic Violence. The purpose of the event was to raise and awareness of domestic violence and to generate donations to the Women's Center which is a volunteer community organization with a primary focus on freedom from domestic and other forms of abuse.
 
A worthy cause for sure, and my participation in the event gave me cause me to reflect on my own experiences with domestic violence and how it has impacted my life. 
 
Although I never had to deal with domestic violence first hand in my own home, it was commonplace in the streets of the neighborhood I grew up in; a small, low-income community of row homes in the suburbs of Philadelphia.  

From the time I was very young, I remember a couple, deep in throes of substance abuse, who lived off-and-on with the husband's mother a few doors down from my family, and whose fights would sometimes spill into the streets or the alley that ran behind our houses. These fights could erupt at any time with no rhyme or reason. It was not uncommon for me to be woken by the sound of them screaming obscenities at each other in the middle of the night and often the verbal barbs would escalate to physical violence.
 
I vividly remember looking out my bedroom once at a very young age and watching this man drag his wife by her hair through the gravel of the alleyway behind my house. Sometimes the cops would should up, sometimes they wouldn't. The cycle of violence continued either way. This behavior went on for years. As a child I could never understand why this woman would continue cohabitate with a man who routinely laid his hands on her. To be honest, as an adult I still have trouble wrapping my brain around it. Even though I know now that there are many reasons why...

​The idea of a woman not leaving an abusive relationship was taken to the extreme in another incident that happened in my neighborhood when I was probably eleven or twelve years old. This one involved different couple with whom I was not really familiar prior to the incident because they were not immediate neighbors. They were immigrants who as far as I knew spoke little or no English and kept very much to themselves. As result they were not people that I had any meaningful contact with, other than passing them on the street or occasionally retrieving a lost ball from their yard.
 
I remember it was a sunny, Saturday morning when a couple of police cruisers and an ambulance descended on their house down the street from my own. Curious, my friends and I approached the scene and witnessed paramedics loading a woman on a stretcher into the ambulance while her husband was loaded by police into a car in handcuffs. Apparently the man had, in a fit of rage, repeatedly taken a meat cleaver to his wife's neck and face. If I close my eyes, I can still picture clearly, drops of the woman’s blood glistening in sun on the concrete path behind their house where she had run to escape him.
 
It was on that day that I learned that horrible things don't only happen on dark and stormy night nights. Sometimes they happen on picture perfect days, when the sky is blue and the sun is shining. This lesson would be reinforced for me years later on September 11, 2001; another time I felt a similar creeping sense of dread on an otherwise idyllic day.
 
Thankfully, the woman survived the attack. But amazingly, not only did she not press charges against him, he was back living in the house with her within just a few days.

But the domestic violence issue that hit closest to home for me was a an assault case involving two of my co-workers who also happened to be neighbors that lived just a few doors down from me.

At the time, I was working at a mom-and-pop meat market behind the deli counter. The incident involved the woman who worked in the deli with me and her live-in boyfriend who also worked at the market behind the butcher counter. Like many of the people in my neighborhood, they were what some would probably describe as “white trash” that lived two doors down from my family with her son who was a few years younger than me.

She was a timid and nervous woman.

The boyfriend no so much...

He was loud and outspoken, and though he tried to project an of air gregariousness, it was clear that something darker was bubbling below the surface. He was often visibly intoxicated around the neighborhood, if not in a state which can only be described as “tweaked out”. As a result, his mood and behavior were extremely unpredictable, and although he never showed any malice towards me directly, just being in his presence always made me uneasy.

When this particular incident occurred it was a Sunday morning at the meat market and the after church rush was in full effect. The line at the deli counter was probably ten deep. This woman and I were working, but the boyfriend was scheduled off. Nevertheless he appeared behind the deli counter, seemingly out of nowhere, red-eyed, and smelling of alcohol. He was carrying on about not being able to find what was apparently his prized possession, a baseball cap featuring the Boar’s Head lunchmeat logo, which his girlfriend had decided to wear to work that day.

As with most acts of random violence, everything happened almost too fast to register. I was in the middle of slicing lunch meat at the time, but out of the corner of my eye, I saw him stumble towards her say something to the effect of “Give me my hat.” As he grabbed it off of her, he pushed her head downward into the stainless steel meat slicer she was working on. It did not come into contact with the blade, but it was enough force to cause her head to “bounce” back off the machine.

I could only stand there dumbfounded. It all seemed to happen within a split second and the next thing I knew he was stumbling past me to leave and as he did, he looked me straight in the eye and smirked, “You didn’t see anything, right Pat?” before leaving the building.

Remember, this was in front of a huge line of customers waiting at the deli counter. If was willing to do this in a crowded store, what was he capable of in the privacy of their home?

I was later subpoenaed to testify at his hearing regarding this incident. I was terrified at the idea of having to do it, knowing that not only was he an unstable and violent drug addict who knew where I worked, but because we were neighbors he knew exactly where I lived. At the preliminary hearing I remember him sitting there stonefaced in that orange jumpsuit watching me as I told my version of the events that transpired that day.

At the subsequent trial he showed up in a suit, with his parents and family minister in tow for moral support. I can’t recall exactly what the judge’s verdict was, but I know it wasn’t long before he was back out on the street and living with his girlfriend and her son again. Despite my fears, he never came after me, or even threatened me, but sadly the same could not be said for his girlfriend. Eventually, they moved out of the neighborhood, so I can’t say how their story ended, but my gut tells me that it was badly.

All of the events I have described here had a profound impact on me, possibly more than I even realize. They introduced me to horrible reality of domestic violence and in doing so helped to strip away some the innocence of my childhood. They made me feel scared, and helpless and guilty just for bearing witness to them. And this is coming from the perspective of someone looking in from the outside. I can’t even imagine the impact it had on the women who were on the receiving end of that violence, or the children who had to suffer it by proxy day in and day out.

Domestic violence is a real life horror that is affects millions of women all over the world, perhaps even some that you know and love. Occasionally it spills out into the light of day as it did in the incidents described above, but more often than not it happens in the shadows or behind closed doors. Because it so often happens in secret, it can sometimes be easy to ignore.

Think about how comfortable and secure you feel when you’re home relaxing on the couch watching T.V. after a long day of work. Now imagine that comfort and security replaced with anxiety and the constant threat of violence.

We as a society must acknowledge that this problem exists, and take whatever steps we can to stop it. These women and their children deserve better, and they have the same right as you and I to feel safe and secure in the comfort of their own homes.

If you would like to make a donation to the Women's Center of Montgomery County you can do so here: http://www.wcmontco.org/donate.html

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